Why You Should Not Vote, by A. Citizen

I would like to begin by thanking those of you are not registered to vote. I would also like to thank those of my fellow citizens that will be too busy to vote. This message is not for you. 

Instead, I would like to address those of my fellow citizens who intend to cast your vote this Tuesday.  If you have already voted, then this message comes to you too late, but if you could keep listening for next time, it would be greatly appreciated.

I will begin by saying that you should pay no mind to those well-meaning people who say “If you don’t vote, then you have no right to complain.”  I would like to take this moment to remind you that we have free speech in the United States of America.  So complain as much as you want.  When candidates that represent your views are not elected, resulting in laws that you support not being passed.  I will be more than happy to listen to your complaining.

The main reason that I don’t want you to vote is that by not voting, you make my vote count more.  And who am I?  I may be a conservative, a liberal, or somewhere in between.  I may be for or against gay marriage, abortion, universal healthcare, marijuana legalization, and civil rights.  I may be rich from birth, rich from hard work, living from paycheck to paycheck, or struggling to survive.  I may have been born on the same day as you; or be old enough to be your parent or your grandparent, or be young enough to be your child. I may be happily single, happily married, or even happily divorced.  I might think that black lives matter, that all lives matter or maybe that no lives matter.  I might  completely support your views or find them to be completely absurd.  That said, you can be rest assured that I will use my vote wisely.

“But voting in my state is pointless,” you say, “My candidate has no chance of winning my state in the presidential election!”  You may be right.  In fact, by not voting, you are definitely making that a true statement.  Besides, if you don’t care enough to vote for the President, you probably don’t care enough to vote for senators, representatives, mayors, city councilors, school board members, judges, sheriffs and dogcatchers.  By not voting you give me more influence over your state and local officials as well.

If every able-bodied citizen of our great country voted, then every citizen would possess an equal amount of power. When fewer people vote, the ones that do have more power.  Consider this: If, let’s say, only one out of every four  people votes, the one person who does is making choices for the other three.  If the one out of four that votes is me, I like that idea!  Indeed, I could be considered a representative myself, albeit one of a very small district.  What it comes down to is that you can be confident that I have every intention of putting your non-vote to good use.

So please, don’t vote.  After all, you can trust me…just like the last time.