Christmas, CREATIVE, Eduardo Soliz, Podcasting, PODCASTS, RANDOMIZER9.COM, Super-Short Storytime, WORDS, Writing

Super-Short Storytime: “Overheard”

Welcome to Super-Short Storytime, literature listeners and audio aficionados!  I am Eduardo Soliz, the composer and narrator of the splendiferously silly story that you are about to hear.

One of the more annoying things about working in a cubicle environment is the fact that you can all-too-easily hear everything your coworkers say.  It can also be one of the more hilarious things, and so I present to you this brief business brief that I call: “Overheard.”

It was another lazy afternoon at the office and so I took the opportunity to chat with the new guy.  Kenny sat a few desks down from me.  He is pretty stocky; dude looks like he used to play football in his younger days.   He seems to be a good guy.           

“Do you have any pets, Eduardo?”  Kenny asked me before taking a swig from a bottle of soda.

“Nah, I have a small apartment and I don’t think it’s big enough for a pet.  Yourself?”  I replied.  Somebody was walking by and I turned to see who it was.  It was Valerie, another new hire.  Like Kenny, she was also pretty nice.  I guess the company figured that one anti-social weirdo was enough after hiring me.

“My fiancé and I have two pugs.”  Kenny replied while raising two fingers with his right hand.

*groan* I hope he’s not one of those, I thought, letting out a small ‘hmm’ before asking: “Y’all don’t call them ‘baby’ by chance, do you?”

“Uh, no.  Why do you ask?” Kenny asked with a chuckle.

“It’s a test.  I’ve noticed that obsessive dog owners tend to call their dogs ‘baby.’  Personally, I think that’s a little nutty, but that’s just me.” I replied.

Unseen to the two of us, Valerie was walking back towards us with a stack of freshly-printed documents in her hands.

“Hey, don’t get me wrong, Ed.  They are our babies, but the nice thing is that I can tie my babies up to a tree in the backyard when they misbehave.” Kenny replied enthusiastically.

The sound of papers falling on the floor immediately followed and we turned to see a horrified Valerie looking at Kenny and exclaiming: “OH MY GOD, YOU DO WHAT TO YOUR BABIES?”

I smiled and exclaimed: “And THAT’S how rumors get started!” 

Kenny and I enjoyed a hearty laugh before he explained to Valerie that no, he wasn’t tying babies to a tree in his backyard.

Well, not people babies, at least.

The end.

I heard the babies Kenny tied up in the backyard were Valerie’s, but you didn’t hear that from me, Dear Listeners!  This has been Super-Short Storytime, for more mirthful monologues visit Eduardo Soliz dot com!  Thank you for listening!  Be Good, Take Care, and God Bless.

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CREATIVE, Eduardo Soliz, Podcasting, PODCASTS, RANDOMIZER9.COM, Super-Short Storytime, WORDS, Writing

Super-Short Storytime: “Cats Kingdom by Paco Panda”

This episode is a reading of a comic story “Cats Kingdom” written and illustrated by Paco Panda. https://www.deviantart.com/pandapaco/art/Cats-Kingdom-01-856780476

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Christmas, CREATIVE, Eduardo Soliz, Podcasting, PODCASTS, RANDOMIZER9.COM, Super-Short Storytime, WORDS, Writing

Super-Short Storytime: “Santa’s Prayer”

Welcome to Super-Short Storytime, literature listeners and audio aficionados!  I am Eduardo Soliz, the composer and narrator of the curt Christmas carol that you are about to hear.  So, without any further ado, I give you, “Santa’s Prayerssst14logo

Another Christmas morning sun arises,
And Santa has come home,
Somewhere out in West Texas,
And not quite the North Pole,

The Mrs. takes his hat and coat,
They share a loving kiss,
He goes up to his room to sleep,
But before Saint Nick can rest,

He gets down to his knees to say
A prayer of grace and thanks,
To God, from whom all good things come,
And so, dear Santa prays:

“Thank you, Lord for another year,
And another chance to share,
Our gifts and generosity,
With children everywhere,

Thank you for my loving wife,
Thank you for the elves,
Thank you for the reindeer,
And all of my helpers,

Thank you for the moms and dads,
All doing the best they can,
Thank you, Father, for all the kids,
In each and every land,

Bless all those children, everywhere,
Whose wishes I can’t fulfill,
So much pain, fear and loneliness,
That I can ever hope to heal,

And so, Dear Father, I do pray
For those children in the world,
For whom a toy will bring a smile,
But who need yet, so much more,

Bless the little ones without families,
The ones who cry in pain,
Bless the ones who live in war and strife,
May they know your peace again,

Bless the hungry ones, so many of them,
May their bellies be empty no more,
Bless the angry ones, who lash out,
May your grace find and make them whole,

Let others find it in their hearts,
To take their blessings and share,
With some of those who need it most,
Fill their hearts with love and care,

And finally, Dear Father,
Please bless and hold dear,
The parents of all the blessed children,
That I will not see next year.”

And then good Santa says “Amen.”
Lays down and closes his eyes,
To dream of a world where all is just,
And children never cry.

Perhaps, as someone once sang: “Someday at Christmas,” Dear Listeners. This has been Super-Short  Storytime and I am Eduardo Soliz and I thank you for listening.  Be good, take care, God Bless, and a Merry Christmas to you and yours.

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CONS, FURRY FIESTA, Writing

Super-Short Stories of Science Gone Mad!

In celebration of Furry Fiesta: Mad Science taking place this weekend, here are a few of my favorite science fiction stories!

A computer created to handle customers goes down, or was it “As Designed?”

What enters his world when a scientist opens a “Doorway” into another dimension?

Intent on taking the world, a madman has to get some minor details ironed out, because it’s”All In The Name.”

One classmate became a business man, the other, a mad scientist; you can imagine how well their “Reunion” went.

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Books, CREATIVE, JUST SAYING, WORDS, Writing

When Do I Start?

A question I often have to ask myself when writing a short story is just when do I start the story. “Well, at the beginning, DUH,” you’re probably thinking to yourself, but things often aren’t that simple.

Since I often have a word limit that I can’t go over, that often doesn’t leave me with enough space to set things up, so the story ends up starting somewhere after the characters, setting, situation, etc, have been established.  Oftentimes, though, those details are not all important to the point I’m trying to make in the story, so that’s okay.

Whenever I’m doing a ‘gag’ story, which is fairly often, I really can’t start at ‘the beginning’ (wherever that may be) because starting near the end makes it easier to hide information that is critical to the punch line. The challenge there is making sure that I give the reader enough information so that they understand what is going on.

Start at the beginning?  If it were only always that simple!

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